Farmer Walter’s turkey has escaped! And
just a week before Thanksgiving! Walter had intended the turkey to feed his
entire family… now, how is he going to feed everyone?!
He goes over the guest list again in his mind: He and his wife have 4 daughters.
Each daughter has 1 brother. How many people are in Walter’s family?
The farmer is so frazzled he can barely remember the size of his family.
He’d been fattening up that turkey all year! The bird probably got help from Blaise the
deer! Darn him to the tips of his antlers!
Seven! Ok, now that the farmer remembers the size of his family,
he can properly brainstorm a solution. But if anyone finds out the turkey escaped,
especially his wife Skyler, he’s in trouble. It reminds the farmer of something his father
used to say. What are you better at the less you practice
it? How did Frederick get it into his bird brain
to make a break for it?! Walter fed that ingrate since he was a baby
turkey. Marriage! And it wouldn’t be an exaggeration
to say this farmer’s marriage itself is at stake if he doesn’t provide
this Thanksgiving! Hanger is REAL, people! Walter knows he needs to find a food solution,
fast. But not a fast-food solution, of course. He begins wildly looking around and muttering
to himself. He looks totally crazy, but it seems like
he’s trying to work out some logistics. If you have one, you have none. If you have
two, you have one. If you have three, you have two.
What is Walter talking about?? This is the last thing the farmer needed.
Last week, he lost a horse. A whole horse! He’s got to pull things together!
Slices! One whole cake has zero cuts, two pieces of cake have one cut, three pieces
had two cuts, and so on. Ok, so dessert is covered, but you can’t
have cake for dinner! Or can you? Nah. Walter needs to find a better solution.
What if instead of turkey we roasted… squirrels? Wait wait, hear me out!
They’re all over the farm and they’re such a nuisance anyway, always eating our
lovely chestnuts. You know, 1.5 squirrels eat 1.5 nuts in 1.5
minutes! So wait.. How many nuts do 9 squirrels eat in 9 minutes?
OK, so it’s not turkey. But there’s a certain nutty tang to squirrel meat, right?
I mean, maybe?? Please don’t sic PETA on me.
The answer is 54. That’s a lot, especially when WE could be
eating those nuts. Forget the squirrels. Walter is panicking
when his neighbor farmer stops by to say hi. Walter explains his predicament.
Listen Walter, I feel for you, and I like a good bet.
If you can answer this question, I’ll give you my nice fat cow.
If you can’t, you have to give me your nice fat pig.
Spell “cow” using 14 letters. This is so like Gus, to torture his neighbor
when Thanksgiving itself is at stake. Farmers are tough friends.
I- I-…I don’t know!!! Too bad, Walter. It would be written as “See
Oh Double You.” Now please hand over your Pee Eye Gee to me!
Out both a turkey AND a pig, the farmer is feeling really desperate.
He glances up at his apple trees and thinks, well, worse comes to worse,
we could have apples carved into the shape of a turkey.
There are 8 apples on each tree. How can Walter’s 7 person family equally share 8 apples?
Can you believe it’s come to this? Apples for Thanksgiving dinner. APPLES.
I know the answer to this one, finally! I can just eat the extra one.
Walter braces himself for the worst Thanksgiving ever, and somewhere far away,
Frederick the turkey is living happily ever after.