The Zero Sum Game (What is A Zero Sum Game and How To End One)


Zero Sum Game You’ve most likely heard me talk about the zero-sum game as being one of the most
dangerous social strategies, also the way to ruin a
relationship completely. But do you actually know
what a zero-sum game is? Today I’m going to unpack the concept of the zero-sum game, so that you fully understand it. A zero-sum game is a scenario in which one person’s gain is
another person’s loss. It’s essentially win – lose. Now by definition, seeing this, you can see that it would
set up a social dynamic that is antagonistic by nature. Not only that, it implies a conviction to the idea that resources are finite and limited. What this does is it makes it
so that people stop functioning in a cooperative way and instead, they begin to function
in a competitive way. This creates danger in the social sphere. What it creates is a
person that can’t take somebody else’s best interest as
a part of their own best interest so they begin to act selfishly. In fact other people’s best interest, including needs desires and preferences, are viewed as a competitive threat. So you can understand the
zero-sum game better, I have a few examples for you: 1. A toddler sitting in a highchair; He says: “I’m not hungry.” his mom will not accept this. He won’t accept that this
is in his best interests. Thus she rejects his truth and shoves a spoon
of food in his mouth or makes him sit there
until he finishes it all. If he does, she wins and he loses. An employee demands a certain salary even though this is not in the
best interest of the company at all. He says: “Pay me this or I quit.” A father decides he is uninterested in facing his personal insecurities and therefore begins to focus on
one of his sons being his problem. He turns his son into the
scapegoat of the family. He designates his other son as the
one who he loves and identifies with. This son has to let go of his identity to stay on his father’s good side. He turns this son into the
golden child of the family. He is in fact playing a zero-sum game with both of his sons. A couple is having problems
with their sex life, the man wants more sex and the wife isn’t interested in it. If the man demands more
or else he will cheat, he is playing a zero-sum game with her. If the wife says no and he’ll just have to deal with it, she’s playing a zero-sum game with him. 5. A conversation takes place between two politicians
who are in conflict, they enter the conversation completely focused on debating
to win the argument and win support of the observers. They’re not interested in considering
each other’s perspective. They are both interested only
in their own best interests, which is why they’re interested
in winning the debate. they are playing a zero-sum
game with each other. A person is hungry and therefore hunts and
shoots an animal for food. Two opponents square off at a sports game. There will be one winner and one loser. This is a zero-sum game. But what sets this zero-sum game apart, is that both have consented
to potentially losing. Neither person has been
forced into a situation where they have to fight to win. Both are consciously engaging
in the zero-sum game for mutual best interests. Such as the improvement or expansion of their craft. Or the mutual opportunity to add to one’s personal
achievement record. The zero-sum game is the hallmark of dysfunctional relationships. Any type of social group will develop zero-sum games if they’re in a dysfunctional state. This doesn’t just include partnerships, this also includes company dynamics and most especially, probably most importantly, family dynamics. In a dysfunctional family what sets the stage for everything is the zero-sum game. The law of the land in a
dysfunctional family unit is: “Every man for himself.” The reason that it’s
hard to recognize this is because people develop all
kinds of different strategies in order to meet their needs. For their own self-centered interests, in this type of a family dynamic where the law of the land is: “Every man for himself.” For example, one person
may turn into a dictator and start punishing people when they don’t cater
to his or her every whim. Another might begin
to self-sacrifice entirely as an attempt to see
themselves as saintly. But the thing is, is that the strategies that people pick for their narcissistic endeavor
in a dysfunctional family unit, becomes a lose-lose for everyone involved. For example, if the person becomes a dictator they win by getting their needs met, but the people around them lose by
having to conform or face consequences. The person who becomes a self-sacrificer will get their self-esteem, but will have to set someone in
the household up as the “bad one” in order to keep that identity. In situations where a zero-sum
game is being played, there’s usually a very poor understanding or respect for boundaries. But that being said, most people have no idea what
I mean when I say boundaries. They’re thinking of a fence. When I say boundaries, most people
are only thinking in terms of “NO”. So you can understand
boundaries more in depth, I want you to watch
my video called: Personal Boundaries vs. Oneness
(How to Develop Healthy Boundaries) Part of what comes along
with personal boundaries is personal best interests. Now, why would we be concerned
with personal best interests when we’re talking about any of this subject? Because, the definition of trust; To trust something is to rely upon it to capitalize upon your best interests. Essentially trust happens when somebody takes another person’s best
interests as part of their own. And by definition this creates a win-win scenario. So you can see that by definition a zero-sum game destroys trust. Trust and love are the
most important things to develop in a relationship. Now this is like, I’m
saying the same thing that everyone has ever said
about relationships before but here’s the thing, most
people have no frickin clue what trust is and what love actually is. So what I mean to say is, what love actually is and
what trust actually is, is the most important thing
to fill in a relationship. The zero-sum game is absent of both. And this becomes a gas light. A gas light is, you didn’t
see what you saw, you didn’t hear what you heard, you didn’t feel what you felt. It’s basically when you know the truth of something is one way, but everyone’s saying it isn’t. Now in a dysfunctional family unit where the zero-sum game is played
or a dysfunctional relationship, people are likely to say: I love you so much and you can trust me. But let me assure you that
there is no actual love and no actual trust present or possible in this type of relationship. It is by definition an
unsafe relationship. to understand more about trust and love, watch my videos titled: What is Love? & How to Have a Safe Relationship? There may be situations in life where it is not possible to
find a win-win scenario, the way you’re thinking about it. When this is the case, the focus of both people becomes
about the incompatibility. The way to keep a relationship safe when incompatibility exists, is now the two people who
are involved in the situation, decide together what to do about that incompatibility. They still take each
other’s best interests as a part of their own, but both look for the closest
win-win scenario they can, given the incompatibility. For example if there’s no win-win way for a couple to stay together, the win-win becomes about
the highest and best way to part ways for both of them. People who have learned to play zero-sum games in relationships are often the worst at
looking at incompatibility. They refuse to accept incompatibility. Even if being in the relationship is destroying the other person. They’re playing and I win
you lose game, right? So they don’t really care
whether the other person actually is an alignment
with their best interests in terms of staying in the relationship. For this reason, it is critical for you to understand and accept incompatibility
in relationships and learn what to do about it. For this reason, I urge
you to watch my video that’s titled: Incompatibility
(A Harsh Reality in Relationships) In order to end a zero-sum game in any relationship, your need for peace, connection and mutual happiness actually has to be higher than any other need that
you’re currently fighting for within that relationship. Of course this is easier said
than done for most people, because they haven’t really chosen that what they want above everything is healthy and safe feeling relationships. Why we blame them; because they’ve grown up
in a world and in a society, and they’ve grown up in families, they’ve grown up in other
relationships beyond their family that teach them that if they
don’t fend for themselves, no one else will. It’s very hard to let go of a: “Thinking about myself and
my own needs” strategy, when it doesn’t feel like anyone
else is gonna look out for them. Now the one exception to this rule that I’m giving you, that your need for connection and your need for mutual happiness, your need for that closeness has got to be greater than other needs, is with triangulation. When somebody is triangulating, the specific need they’re trying to meet, quite literally is connection. However, they’re creating that connection and that sense of closeness and
security in the relationship By creating a zero-sum game against someone else. The very worst thing about a zero-sum game is it locks you into one yourself. Even if you don’t want to be playing one. It puts you in a lose-lose. And here’s how; If somebody begins to play a
zero-sum game with you, if you don’t fight for
your best interests, you lose. If you do… Not only does that
destroy the relationship with the person you’re playing
the zero-sum game against, it’s also a guarantee that
even if you do win, you’ll get hurt. Integration is the end
of the zero-sum game. In a state of integration, what you’re doing is you’re
taking the other person as a part of yourself. You’re taking their best interest
as a part of yourself Therefore, you can’t hurt them without hurting yourself. Also to the flip side, you can’t hurt yourself without
hurting them. Can you? So what this creates is, you’re not going to self-sacrifice and you’re also not going to
bulldoze their best interests. You’re going to commit
together in all scenarios to find the highest and best
win-win in any scenario. The second thing to do to
end the zero-sum game, is holding both love and trust (what they really are) as the pillars that you build
your relationships between. There is a space between any two entities, the space we could call “us”. This space is in fact where a relationship develops. And that relationship can be
treated like a third entity in the relationship itself. Like a child. All relationships must be treated as if it is a child. Anytime you are playing a zero-sum game, you are in fact destroying
that third entity, the relationship itself. You might as well be
starving a child to death or abusing it. The win-win scenario is what strengths this child that we could call the “US” or the relationship itself. I also need to remind you that even if you do “end a relationship” you’re still in a relationship
with that person. It’s just a differently configured one. The reason is that this person
didn’t cease to exist, in the universe, the second that you stopped
having a relationship with them. Therefore there still needs to be a
commitment to the win-win scenario There still needs to be a commitment
to the safe relationship. Even though you’ve decided
that what’s safe or good for both of your best interest, is not to be with each other anymore. For example, you’re now ex partners
instead of partners. So there’s still a third
entity to take care of. The zero-sum game should never begin if
you break up, so to speak. The commitment still needs to be
to the highest and best win-win that can be found. A win-win scenario, is the third element or the third option within any scenario. Our commitment needs to
be to this third element. Now finding this third element is very different than
compromise in a relationship. For those of us that are interested
in healthy relationships, compromise is in fact a dirty word, you might as well be swearing. A compromise is by definition an agreement or a settlement of a dispute that is reached by each
side making concessions. Concessions implies giving something up that you don’t want to give up. Therefore what people are really saying when they’re compromising is: “I’ll take a little pain and
you take a little pain.” The thing you’ve gotta
understand about humans is that people can’t actually do this. Most people aren’t aware
they can’t actually do this, it’s just, they compromise
and then down the road they’re still feeling resentful. The reason is that if you
give up something you don’t want to give up
and it causes you pain, that pain causes you to feel “bad blood” or negatively towards the other person, who you’ve compromised for. It’s a way to set your
relationships ups for failure. In a true win-win, even if you end up giving something up, the giving up of that thing
won’t in fact cause you pain. In fact it won’t feel like you’re
making a concession. It will feel like you found
something that’s also a: “Yeah, that alternative
is also good for me.” The zero-sum game is not really a relationship. It is I, me and mine. Now you can’t actually
do this in a relationship. Why? Because you have to accept that if you are going to stand squarely on the side of me, mine and I, i.e. playing a zero-sum game, You run the very real risk of actually losing that relationship. Now, this is something that so many people in relationships have had to find out the hard way. This is something that companies
have had to find out the hard way. So many marriages end because of this. So many business partnerships dissolve because of this and so many parents lose their children once they become adults, because of this. These parents spend the formative years with their children, playing zero-sum games
with their children. Of course, they’re not conscious of it, they just call it parenting. It’s what their parents did to them. They spent those formative years subconsciously putting these
children in the position to lose, but to Gaslight them by saying: “It’s good discipline.” “I’m doing this for your own good.” “everything I’ve ever done was
for you.” and “I love you so much.” If you can’t see your child as a person, a person with boundaries, meaning personal needs, personal feelings, personal desires, personal best interests, and work with those, instead of just making
the decisions for them, you are playing a zero-sum
game with your children. In any relationship, there can be no true winner
when there is a loser. There is only strength in the relationship if there is mutual benefit in it. As so many people who
have lost relationships have found out the hard way. The time has come on this planet for human beings to end
the zero-sum game with everything in existence. With themselves, with the world itself, with other species… Thing is in a relationship, if one person wins and another loses or one being wins and another loses, both of them ultimately lose. The great history of wars on this planet should perhaps be the greatest
teacher of this concept. Have a good week. Subtitles by: Tanya Duarte
www.tanyaduarte.com Subtitles by the Amara.org community

100 thoughts on “The Zero Sum Game (What is A Zero Sum Game and How To End One)

  1. This is literally impossible on the planet – we compete with other humans and animals and plants for resources. We have to consume at minimum plants for sustenance, which by your definition is a zero-sum game with plants.

  2. so can you please make a video about this third side/ creative solutions? Because thats where it is hard work, not in simply avoiding this dynamic

  3. No se trata de ser dictador sino q hay diferentes capacidades intelectuales unos doninan a otros pero no significa q sean dictadores es la 3 dimension sur es sur norte norte pero cada uno cumple en algo del todo

  4. I’m constantly inspired by you. Your teachings have been so practical that I feel like they are being used in my day to day lives. You are very different from other spiritual teachers and for that reason, I thank you.

  5. You're Actually A Savage If You Read More

    Hello I think that nobody will even see this but if only one person read this it will make my day but to the few people reading this I hope you have a great life and good luck in the future and I know fame doesn't happen overnight but I'm trying my hardest to become a successful YouTuber one day and please wish me luck by hitting the subscribe button

  6. Sometimes the self-sacrificer doesn’t set someone up to look bad, but if suddenly stops sacrificing and helping gets set up to look bad, ends up with PTSD and suffers in social isolation.

  7. So. I definitely grew up playing "zero sum games" with my mother, but it was always for a good ~reason – she was a single mom and it always had to be her way because she was the only parent, or she was struggling financially, or she didn't have time, or she was too stressed out – everything was always a valid reason for why it had to be her way. It wasn't like a choice like this video describes, where someone's being mean just to be mean or whatever. I really feel like my mom loved me but also didn't make great choices and so she could never really provide for us properly and it cramped her ability to provide, and that trickled down into me just having to do whatever she decided – often just because she was stressed. Except over time this emerged as a pattern and finally I decided she did have a choice, she just always chooses the thing that will continue her life cycle of pain and poverty. Right now I'm not speaking to her. I can't even think about it. But I don't think she did any of this malevolently, so it's confusing. I never hear people addressing what poverty forces people to do or not do, the damage it does. Most spiritual teachers act like choices happen independent of circumstances, but what if it was very much tied to very tangible resources, and not just a freely made choice? It's hard to be mad and it's also hard not to be and it's also hard to digest in this wordless way I can't describe.

  8. Very very common sick pattern in the American society, a pattern you see every time you turn your head, everywhere. People are obsessed every whr trying to prove themselves and others around them, they 'win', someone else lose, when they aren't really. Pure Illusion!! I became aware of this pattern in few months I moved to the US. I have been wondering for years about the best suited term. Thank you Teal Swan for pointing it out. Healings always starts with recognizing. Love and Light💕💕

  9. Capitalism is a destructive social order. Capitalism and cannibalism are VERY synonymous. Food doesn't grow on trees anymore, it has to be taken from someone else..

  10. I agree with much of this… some things I am not sure of. Don''t really agree with the point on 'compromise!' Surely, there is nothing wrong with compromise, perhaps it can even be a good thing… as long as we don't compromise ourselves?

  11. the law of this world is simple "DO AS I SAY NOT AS I DO" it's a world governed by hypocricy born of power and priveledge…wealth..manipulation thru fear (royals…religion..government..police..military) if I have the power and u obviously dont what else but the use of my power over you is gonna happen? regardless of my standpoint I am correct because I am in power and u are the lawless rebel fighting against the power u exist in which is me…this is the elitist psychology…u either rise to become more powerful or are falling by degree and becoming disempowered….life is governed by competition which breeds brutality..violence and killing..it is how it is and u cant change it

  12. A starving person hunting for food is a zero sum game? Doubt. That animal served its purpose and now that person can survive to live out their purpose. Circle of life. Does she think eating plants is a zero sum game too?

  13. this really triggered me. just because what you describing no one can or don't really want to do – I donno if it's even possible to have a relationship without zero sum game…

  14. Lezbehonest Teal. You made this whole channel so that you can have wild sex parties with the fans 🎉 🎉 #pleaseinviteme

  15. Thank you as always, Teal! I truly enjoy your information and your insight! You have worked so hard on these video's and giving information for many years. We appreciate you! Sending love to you from Arizona ❤

  16. I agree with what you're saying in this video, hearing the term Zero Sum Game for the first time. I wonder how much double bind is part of that game when an equal amount of love and hate is projected on others in a relationship. I remember a double-bind relationship of a once upon a lifetime and this experience is teaching me until this day. I observe immediately when that imprint is triggered and so I can make a new choice. The training of a new muscle. From the past in the present.
    Knowing the fairy tales I can tell myself, in order to make myself believe in something that is unreal, I've come to the conclusion that a person who is in a survival mode for a longer time, isn't a rational thinking person. Discernment is covered up by anxiety and fear.
    Today I realized that a dysfunctional family can use rude and abrasive manners, as a means to be in touch and confirm a bonding that knows not of love and respect. but of hurting and pain. In that way, family-life becomes a Perpetuum mobile of dramatic scenes in need of repetition. I witness this in the lower class population of Britain often. Which knows harsh austerity now.

  17. This video explains so much even though I knew this! spoken in plain language for even the most inept in awareness to understand. With a 13 year old son I'll remember your words ledgered into my mind for his future. Thank you Teal! This will and most likely is groundbreaking for many! MJ x . Hit the likes guys get this out there!

  18. Teal please look into False Light and False Ascension.

    This raise your vibration to match "the transition" is a false light psy op from the astral realm.

    The astral realm is not telling us the truth about that the third eye and a lot more

  19. The old days – never cross streets without looking both ways, distraction is a zero sum game
    The most professional grade OLED ever made the brain develops varicose veins
    -canibus from a track called Multi Screen Madness

  20. It's an infinite loop. A zero sum game is just life. If everyone understood they are all connected, and everyone agreed to everyone else's best interests (which then suggests that you know what I know, and I know what you know). We'd quite literally have no reason, nor need to exist.

    We'd simply be.

    Nothing more, nothing less. Don't need to talk to each other, because you already know what I'm going to say, and you mutually agree with me, so I don't need to convince you of my point (which would be a zero sum game anyway). You then don't need to work, because we all mutually agree to each other's needs, and capacity to contribute. Wouldn't need to eat, because of the same reasons. Why go out at all, and so on, and so on. Until the point we then return to our true selves, and are just pools of pure interconnected energy, existing in a pure state of everything and nothing, all at once, always (and never).

    Yeah, we got bored of that existence, and instead created layer upon layer of zero sum game upon zero sum game, that resulted in everything you see here.

    Is it pointless? Yes, it absolutely is… But it beats floating around in pure nothing, never talking or doing anything. Because to do anything, you have to play a zero sum game. Yes, moving in any way, thinking etc, is a zero sum game (just on a whole other level).

    So the fact is, you agreed to every single zero sum game, fully aware (and yet unknowingly) of that agreement. And if you didn't, you were still involved in that zero sum game, and lost, which is why you're here… Playing a zero sum game.

    Confused yet?

    Just go with it. If you try fighting it, it'll go on infinitely, until someone gives up. Therefore we'd both win, but both lose, at the same time.

    The better question is. How do you get out of infinity? Pretty sure 42 isn't the answer.

    At least, that's what I drew from this video.

  21. Thanks Teal, another fantastic video & as usual I have to watch it each one at least 4/5 times before I truly understand & know that I'm starting to live by your content. You are so important in my life Teal, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
    Big hugs from Australia 🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺
    XXX💖🙏😉✌👌😁👏👏👏👏👏👏😗😗😃

  22. Thank you teal! This is exactly what I'm seeing and really having a hard time understanding!!! Thank you! Hugs and kisses to you and all your family:) team:)

  23. Forgiving me for any incomprehensible ignorance, but can anyone explain to me what zero sum game really means purely linguistic? Is that where the result of something becomes equal to zero? If so, I just don't quite understand the idea of calling it the zero sum game. If you use zero sum game with people, it is as if the sum does not become zero, but minus something.

  24. I stopped writing competitive exams for jobs because I am getting the job by making a whole lot of people sad, I am sure that job will make me sad in the long run.

  25. I've learnt this in the relationship I have been in for 16 yrs now. You realize that for it to work out and your both happy, you have to find the Inbetween that works for both always. There is no ego in this. There is complete openness and trust. It took me a while to get it but I am there now.

  26. brilliant bulls eye. best yet. thank you ! so well considered. the hole in the boat, you've found it. more power to you , this is the well. xm

  27. Enjoyed your video Teal. Watch the movie Wall Street and the scene with Michael Douglas explaining "The Zero Sum Game" to Charlie Sheen. "It's a zero sum game pal, there are no winners and there are no losers, the money just merely changes hands".

  28. This video was amazing & although I've heard you talk about zero sum games before it really clicked for me. Our whole lives are these games! That's why so few really trust anyone & why I personally for years shut myself off completely (also a zero sum game) I'm definitely better at the win win with my daughter than I am my partner or family & I'm definitely going to get more aware of when I'm playing these games. Thank you. 🙏 love the new dramatic music too

  29. Do animals play a zero sum game when they too kill to eat comfortably and naturally? How are animals a match to each other and not to us? Why can’t we kill and it be natural and how are we not a match to something like a mango?

  30. Dude you're looking drastically manlier as you age. Must suck being reminded you're not an woman as you shave your beard once every 2 to 3 days… lmao

  31. I dug into the Archetypes my family(-ancestors) represented. With unconditional love as a tool I wrecked the foundations and started building again from scratch. And now we all are reaping the abundant rewards ❤

  32. Thank You Dear Teal, for your words of wisdom. This info helps me to better understand why I didn't like games as a child … much … I did play them but I could not understand why others wanted to win … I didn't like seeing anyone loose. My best friend and I never played any game (cards, chess, monopoly …by the rules … we just played till we were tired of that game with no winner or looser. (her mother baby-set for me while my mom worked the evening shift … so I was there most evenings and slept there and well this best friend was really more like a sister).
    I never enjoyed watching competitions and when my late husband talked me into being a judge for a local science fair event at the local college (BSU) (He had been a judge at the event for years … I'd never even went with him) … I was reluctant but accepted. I saw the selection of the few (I think 3 top winners) out of so many who had perfectly great projects … I saw from the inside the process and I was so uncomfortable with the entire thing … made me realize the extent that people are excluded from ever going further in their fields … just from one simple event that nearly everyone thinks is …. needed???? My, late, husband could never understand why competition bothered me so … and I could never help him see the harm that came from it …
    In one of the replies to a comment below, Jin Kim, points out that lack and competition is in nature, " … and they are correct and I am watching the TV series showing wild animals in nature … yes mostly competing for food and water … and for life … BUT only when resources are limited … when a large old elephant died … the lions allowed every other animal to eat … alongside them and it was also very cool and interesting to see all those animals (lions, wild dogs, hyenas, vultures, etc … All of them moved aside and back when another elephant came to morn the lost one.) So .. lack, is shown, even in nature, to be to the true root of competition … and we have been taught by games that there is lack … that we must compete … when in fact we do not.
    Love & Peace to All

  33. M. Rosenberg's (C. Roger's pupil) NonViolent Communication is teaching us this important topic well. As of relatively recently, NVC is being taught at schools and universities for professions that are about educational or therapeutic relationships/care. But it takes way more than that to truly integrate it in our personal and professional life. Even Rosenberg, a clinical psychologist says – it is a spiritual work (too). Thank you, Teal.

  34. I think it's a win/win when I put myself first but open to collaborate (or vice versa the other person puts themself first or both which is best).
    Is putting my best interest first a zero/sum game? I know that when I do something that I don't want to do for the sake of someone else it creates conflict in me because I can't blame them for a choice that I made (so I usually chose what works for me). It doesn't make sense to me to take someone's best interest as my own if they can't even see what's in their best interest.
    You're right Teal, it is like talking to a child.
    Example: Someone's complaining about work to you (they do this almost daily) and you know that it's been 3 hours and you're just hearing the same story told in different ways and you believe it's time to discuss solutions rather continuing to complain is in their best interest but they believe that complaining and being upset is in their best interest. I'm not an enabler whose not going to tell you that I see a problem and when I do people usually get mad no matter how I deliver it. So either way I lose unless I'm dealing with a person who is on my level mentally (aka someone who questions themself, attempts to learn how to understand their emotions and the emotions of others or understand the concept of "I don't know" etc)
    We're not taught how to feel, think or communicate in school and most parents don't teach you how to either. The root words of government means guide, rule, direct mind or mental but most governments use this to their advantage and not for our best interest. I'm trying to find a place that works with my spirit principles but if I can't find one I'll make it.
    What I'm saying is that when you vibrate higher you can't take everybody with you.

  35. So, can anybody answer my question please…am I to understand that compromise will never work in a relationship as there will always be resentment? By definition a compromise means that both parties won’t both get all their own way…so will both be holding resentment towards the other? If so, it could be like looking for a needle in a haystack to find a mirror image of yourself ‘partner’, with exactly the same interests, opinions, wants, desires etc….If two people happen to fall in love, who are not totally compatible with each other, is this always doomed to fail? That’s quite a sad thought….very interesting topic though Teal, thank you. Love to all.

  36. At some point people really should take responsibility for their actions. Even if you go through certain experiences as a child, that doesn't mean you don't take a step forward – reflect – and think HOW CAN I DO BETTER? That is something we should always be asking ourselves with everything we do. We can't continually live in a state of victimhood and think we can grow into something more. If you treat someone badly, take a look at why – and BE a better person. If things go wrong – do some self-analysis and think about how that can be prevented in the future. Only be bettering ourselves will we become the type of person that doesn't need a relationship to feel complete – we will already be complete and welcome someone into our space because we truly love them and have something sacred to share…. <3 We have the opportunity to take a Giant Step forward – let us become who we were truly meant to be — there is no limit on our growth!!

  37. Just discovered Teal! Watched a few of the videos, caught up on the allegations. My opinion is… I believe her and I think she's here to help. Thank you Teal

  38. Listening to you speaking, I can imagine you stirring a spoon around the rim of a cup of tea while your subscribers become hypnotized by your monotone voice. I can imagine that this is how cult leaders speak to lost souls and the depression suffering masses to obtain their loyalty. Do your loyal subscribers feel "actual trust" and "actual love" with and for you? I couldn't trust or love a person who goes by a ridiculous name and who doesn't trust and love her subscribers enough to use her name on her birth certificate. And lastly, if you and your 'flock' want to believe in this nonsense that is your business, but don't say to your flock that it's time for "the world" to change. Many people including myself are very joyful and fulfilled in our lives. If your brainwashed cult members try to impose your craziness on the rest of society, we will indeed show you what a zero sum game "actually" is. God bless you.

  39. According to Giggle, at least, there is not one single location online to share the journey that comes from applying Teal's work. This is most curious.

  40. Hello everybody I feel like there's something you need to witness and be aware of : I purchased Teal Swan e-book "the connection" all was great. unfortunately – my e-mails were erased – so I couldn't find the e-book I paid for again. I sent an e-mail with all of the order confirmation and details, to the support team of Teal Swan, in her web-site. and you know what the answer I got was? here you go : "Hello!

    We actually only sell the audiobook of The Connection Process on our website. The paperback book or the eBook are only sold on platforms such as Amazon at this time, so whichever website you used to purchase it is who needs to be contacted to help you with this matter 🙂

    Hope this helps,

    Cyan Merchandise Manager" in other words – they put the blame on someone else – instead of helping. and do not give you anything to somewhat help you.

    I expect your reply as soon as possible.

  41. Well isn't that just the pot calling the kettle black? Zero sum, or rather, in other words shadow projection throwing 50 shades of gray. Abuse control, co–dependence independence, power, trauma victim, triggers triangulation. Difference is I guess depends on meeting up in real life

  42. What if I want to figure out things out but the other person is not being able to communicate and keeps getting in a victim mode?

  43. Can you talk about the energetic vibration of mold and what would make me a match to having a mold problem in my house? I get an understanding/shift from every video of yours. Thank you Teal

  44. I have the same opinion about the Zero sum games… Since i was growing up… I have observed this. Its not necessary that one needs to be a loser and the other winner… But sometimes somthing has to loose to gain forward… Like loosing old patterns. … Fualty beliefs… Something needs to be hated in order to truly love something.

    The best part of this video is where you explain "Integration.

  45. We are playing a zero sum game with nature and Mother Earth. Our national parks were an attempt to create a win-win scenario.

  46. There are many relationships around me who 'keep score', I feel much like it is become a norm in the younger people. As a hermit, I don't experience this. The two have forgotten the third, which has to be born and prioritized. What is more true the unification of two (One), or the infinite splitting of hairs? (many)… I am reconciling my masculine qualities and my feminine, The masculine is starving for the true feminine, and visa versa. For me it is a chemical reaction. From this push and pull within, a new material formed, no separation can sever this kind of agape (Love for this new child). Teal has a light for us, a practical psychology, of real depth. I am inspired by her psychological insight. Love her artwork!

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