It’s too late, mighty Taranis king of
thunder of Galilee In a few minutes, all Megalopolisville will be destroyed to become my new evil kingdom! Quick, Taranis, the tower! It’s a catalyst for his power! You have to destroy it now or more than dozens of people will die with just the energy wave that the tower will emanate! Great, but… with thunder? Yes, with thunder, Taranis! Sure, sure of course! But, when you mean dozens, how many is that exactly? Are you fucking kidding me? No, I’m just doing some math to understand the cost benefit of the whole Thunder thing But okay, let’s do it! Let’s go!! Cost benefit what? What’s happening!? Hello, Stuart? Hey! yeah, so we’ll need about five or six… If you have a virgin there might be good
too… now! yeah, now it’s good Sorry uh…Taranis, what are you doing? Uh… the Thunder thing.. No, you’re talking on your phone… instead of doing the Thunder thing that
I told you to do But that’s it, theThunder thing! Human sacrifice, the whole thing… Human sacrifice? Whoa whoa, wait! What are you talking about? Wait , wait… you’re really going to do that? Really? You’re supposed to be the smartest, most cultured guy on earth you You could build a nuclear power plant with a box of matches and glue and string, but you don’t know where my powers come from? What? I…whoa! I thought this human sacrifice thing was a myth! Of course it’s a myth! But so is as a half naked Thunder guard and here we are! Do you or don’t you want the whole Thunder thing? Can’t you do the Thunder thing without sacrificing anybody? NO! You think I don’t prefer that also? But
unfortunately that’s the way it goes but look we’re still good, sacrificing six
people, or so, to save a few dozen is still good, right? That’s not how we do things, Taranis! We can’t just get people killed! The goal is to save people here! You mean we can’t get any more people killed, right? That’s what you mean.. Oh shit… tell me you didn’t… I thought you knew! Sacrifice is implicit in this kind of thing Being a Welsh God and all… What did you guys think that I asked for tithing from my buddies? I can’t believe we can’t find a fucking God that doesn’t have to kill a lot of people to use his powers Alright folks, this is Dionysus, a cousin of mine if you throw a good party with a considerable orgy of, at least, fifteen to sixteen people to honor him, you can use his powers without any human sacrifice Yeah, what’s his superpower? Wine Then thou can get six, nay seven, of my most precious libations If thous can acquire me a fiery headed bear man… in a hot tub


  1. "It's too late, mighty Taranis king of thunder of Galilee…"

    Oookay. I can't believe how much hidden truth they just squeezed into like 2 seconds of dialogue. But then again, cartoons have always been used as a viral means of spreading historical and sociopolitical commentary…

    Taranis is the ancient Celtic God of Thunder once worshipped in Gaul, Britannia and Eire, among other places. He is depicted with dark skin and an afro because, contrary to popular belief, the original Celts and Picts were in fact black people. Moreover, Taranis is called the God from Galilee because the Black Celts are direct descendants of the original black Hebrew tribes spoken of in the Bible, specifically the Tribe of Dan. Even a great many white Irish people today have these same black ancestors. The genetic proof is the red hair seen throughout Scotland and Ireland. Such a high population of this rare mutation can only arise from a bloodline with high concentrations of melanin.

    Interestingly enough, the Irish are the only white people who match the Biblical prophecy of being led into captivity on ships just like their black Hebrew cousins stolen from the slave port Ouidah (Judah) in Africa. This is why many white European nations look down upon them, sometimes even calling them Green Niggers. Ironically enough, however, the derogatory word "nigger" is derived from ancient Egyptian "net-ger" and Ethiopian "negus" which literally mean "king" or "god". This is why the Loki character calls Taranis the king of thunder; "king" and "god" are virtually synonymous in the context of the original African term "naga".

    Don't just yuck it up, kiddies. Do your research. The animators of this clever cartoon series are apparently quite educated and are doing their damnedest to pass along vital bits of esoteric knowledge. Shalom.

  2. Fun Fact:
    IRL Thor was popular with the Ancient Norse because he hated human sacrifices. Odin, OTOH, required nine men to be sacrificed every 9th year.

  3. The whole human sacrifice thing would actually make for a great morality character plot. A god who needs to take lives to save lives. Is the cost to great? Can he do it without the sacrifice? What are the consequences of not using the sacrifice?

  4. This is brilliant commentary on how the old religious gods were actually pretty disgusting perverts, yet none of that seems to be translated into how they are interpreted in modern popular media.

  5. Really? A morality debate? This is rich coming from the guy who spent 4 billion on a walking death machine but won't supply jobs or food.

  6. If you want me to save your precious citizens, you're going to have to prove your devotion to me. Six of your lovely, virgin daughters will do.

  7. Thankfully, the human sacrifice only involves Hatians & Africans, there's a surplus of those these days. Heck, you only need to only wait a bit and off the starving ones whom are going to just die anyways. Everyone wins!

  8. Discount Loki with mustache: Soooo… are you guys going to… do anything about this?
    I mean, aren't you here to… you know… stop me?
    Cause my tower is almost charged up. You know that, right?

  9. To the creators of this Filth, may you Suffer greatly, may your Children be eaten by Pitbulls for portraying DIONYSUS in this Cartoon!…

  10. Yeah im going to go with wine god. Nobody has to die. So we can get the villian drunk of god wine. So drunk he gets alcohol posining to which he dies.

  11. Actually Dionysus is a pretty frightening being to have on your side. We’re talking Eldritch rituals of madness where wine and blood become indistinguishable.

  12. Googled Taranis. Actual celtic god. Like Thor is an actual scandinavian god. I like you people-who-create-society-of-virtue.

  13. The intoxicated women of Dionysus orgies were said to engage in killing sprees of ripping men apart. Good luck with that.

  14. This is actually pretty deep, it is the tram car paradox that's often ignored for plot convenience in typical superhero movies.

  15. This is we why worship Yahweh. You don't need to sacrifice anything but your selfish ways, and you'll be all set.

  16. honest question if he is welsh, why is he black ? i though he would be the brother voodo mistical parody

  17. Even with Dionysus power, the problem would be no criminals held responsible because laws make drunk ppl not liable…because of consent, unless they're driving(DUI).
    Then again, the criminals would sue the heroes because of consent shit.

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